Couple with spinal defect adopt daughter with the same condition

A married couple with spina bifida have lovingly adopted a daughter with the same condition.

Larry and Kelly Peterson from Cedar Lake, Indiana, met at a camp for children with spina bifida, a birth defect where a baby’s spine and spinal cord don’t develop properly in the womb, causing a gap in the spine. 

The Petersons discovered that they had lots in common, including the same birthday.

For a few years they lost contact but reunited as teenagers and started dating in high school, however, they decided to go their separate ways when Kelly left for college.

A decade passed where the pair lost contact but in 2013 they reconnected through social media and two years later they got married. 

They were keen to start a family, but as the couple were not able to have biological children of their own, they decided to try adopting a child instead.

With the help of Special Angels Adoption and the National Down Syndrome Adoption Network, the Petersons were introduced to baby Hadley who also has spina bifida.

In addition to spina bifida, Hadley has a congenital heart defect which resulted in two holes in her heart and required close monitoring and surgery in the early stages of her life.

Due to their experience of spina bifida and their knowledge of the difficulties that may arise for Hadley in the future, the Petersons knew they could offer Hadley the love, support, and understanding that she needed to live a happy and fulfilling life.

Reflecting on their journey of parenthood, the Petersons commented that it has been challenging and joyous in equal measure. 

Although Ms Peterson has extensive experience with children with disabilities, having worked as a special education teacher for the past 24 years, she noted that becoming a mother has been a transformative experience that has opened her eyes to the ups and downs of raising a child with a disability as a disabled person. 

While Mr Peterson can walk when holding onto support, Ms Peterson has no function in her legs. As a result, the couple have had to learn how to parent from their wheelchairs.

Fortunately, the couple has family nearby to pitch in when they’re working to help them care for Hadley and balance home life with work life.

The Petersons have now turned their attention to advocating for adults navigating life with spina bifida who are hoping to become parents.

Their goal is to break the stigma that society has formed around disability and parenting. 

To achieve this, they decided to start a Facebook page to raise awareness of spina bifida and share their journey of parenthood.

They also wanted to create a resource for parents who have received a spina bifida diagnosis in the family or for people seeking support on topics such as adoption and parenting.

“We want to let society see that people with spina bifida live a life just like their non-disabled peers. It’s nothing shocking or amazing. We’re living our life just like everyone else,” Ms Peterson said.

The Petersons encourage people with spina bifida who are looking to become parents to not let their disability hold them back from achieving this goal, but they should be mindful of different policies depending on the adoption agency.

“Adoption is a learning process and you need to keep pushing along,” they said.

Posting an update to her community of almost 500 followers, Ms Peterson shared that Hadley finally got her cast off after having surgery in September, and has also started sleeping in her own bedroom, a significant milestone that earned her a sweet treat!

In her post, Ms Peterson wrote, “Today actually marks one week of [Hadley] sleeping in her room without us. That’s why she was happy to have her chocolate ice cream. That has been the incentive since this summer for sleeping a whole week by herself. She finally did it!”

Shortly after Hadley’s arrival, the Petersons were contacted by the agency which they adopted Hadley from and informed of a photographer named Angela Forker from Indiana who was seeking children with disabilities to photograph as part of her Precious Baby Project.

The project was launched in memory of a baby named Madalyn from the Petersons’ local church who sadly passed away from holoprosencephaly, a condition that occurs when the brain’s hemispheres don’t fully separate during development in the womb.

Madalyn’s parents cherished every moment they had with her, and on the day of her funeral, they released 15 balloons to celebrate the 15 days they were blessed to have her in their lives.

“Her parents showed the world that every life is beautiful and that every baby deserves to be cherished,” Ms Forker said. “And now it’s my mission to show the world what you already know: that every life is beautiful and deserves to be loved.” 

On her website, Ms Forker explained that the project was born of a “desire to spread hope and raise awareness for babies with special needs”.

“While some babies may come into the world differently than their parents had expected, they’re no less precious than any other baby,” Ms Forker said.

“And while some may have medical issues, with hope and a miracle or two, they may defy the odds and accomplish the impossible. That’s what I hope to portray as I photograph these precious little ones in these beautiful and whimsical scenes.”

Ms Peterson was impressed by Ms Forker’s work, so decided to get in touch with her to find out how she could get involved.

Ms Peterson and Ms Forker had the same idea—for the Petersons to be photographed alongside Hadley while lying on their stomachs, exposing their scars to the camera.

The idea was to symbolise that even though the Petersons don’t share the same DNA with Hadley, they have the same scars.

Reflecting on the experience of working with the Petersons, Ms Forker said, “Kelly and Larry have worked so hard. They overcome challenges because they have the determination. They were so much fun to work with […] I was blown away by this couple.”

Click here to find out more about Ms Forker’s work as a newborn photographer.