Children are supposed to bury their parents — not the other way around. Child loss can psychologically scar bereaved families for life. The untimely death of a young one can also catch parents off guard financially.
That’s why Stevie Stones is heaven-sent for grief-stricken parents. This Worcester, England-based charity helps parents enduring child loss afford a memorial to honor the memory of their little angels.
Finding Safe Space on the Football Pitch
Stevie Stones collaborates with like-minded organizations in the United Kingdom to extend financial and emotional support to bereaved families going through a rough patch after losing a baby. One of these godsends is Sands.
Formerly known as the Stillbirth and Perinatal Death Association, Sands helps fund research in reproductive health, neonatal development and other fields of interest to better understand infant mortality.
Moreover, peer-to-peer bereavement support is at the heart of this London-headquartered social services organization — a critical resource for parents in mourning who may need six months to a year to process what happened.
Sands offers programs to ensure those affected by the death of a child receive compassion as they come to terms with their loss, pick up the pieces and move forward. One of them is Sands United — a football-centric initiative for bereaved men who often grieve in silence.
The volunteer-run Sands United FC community arranges friendly football matches to bring grieving fathers, brothers and uncles together, giving them access to a loving support system while enjoying the sport they love. The program has become a national phenomenon, growing from one team in 2018 to 30 in 2022.
Every game between two local Sands United FC teams is a form of escapism — a chance for men carrying a heavy heart to forget their pain through the game instead of drowning their sorrows.
The goal of Sands United is to encourage men who may be bottling up their emotions to loosen up and feel comfortable enough to talk about their grief instead of suffering in isolation.
Many men are reluctant to share their feelings out of fear of being judged, misunderstood or ignored. Although 69% of British males agree that talking to someone about their problems is better than taking medication, only 27% of men go to therapy.
Sands United aims to create an environment where men can show vulnerability in front of those who have or are walking in their shoes. Those who open up can find solace in expressing their heartbreak, while the rest can feel a sense of belonging.
Marking Where Angels Lie
Stevie Stones partners with Sands to raise awareness of its mission — to help bereaved families in Worcestershire afford a memorial.
After losing their beloved 3-year-old daughter Stevie and laying her to rest, Naomi and Barri Graham noticed that some nearby children’s resting places in the cemetery were unmarked. Aside from feeling heartbroken after realizing some families couldn’t afford to memorialize the children they lost, they found the process of customizing Stevie’s headstone therapeutic.
Since then, the two decided to create a charity in Stevie’s honor dedicated to helping bereaved parents access funding to afford a marker or some other memento to remember their little angels by. Stevie Stones was born.
The charity has teamed up with the Stonemasons of Worcester — the local masonry contractor the Grahams hired to build a headstone that captured their daughter’s essence. Stevie Stones guides beneficiaries through the process of selecting and ordering a memorial.
The organization can shoulder up to £800 — about $1,000 — of a headstone’s cost and pays the Stonemasons of Worcester directly after finalizing the memorial’s design and engraved message with every family. Such an amount is a huge help for grieving families considering a direct burial to cut costs and avoid expenses associated with embalming, flower arrangements and more.
The efforts of Stevie Stones aren’t going unnoticed. In 2023, it was one of the finalists for Charity or Community Contributor of the Year during the Midlands Service Excellence Awards.
This recognition only motivated the organization to make a greater impact in Worcestershire, especially since East and West Midlands families now have to spend £4,233 — roughly $5,400 — for a funeral on average.
Stevie Stones — Helping Bereaved Families Memorialize the Children They Lost
Installing a marker on the resting place of a child is a small but therapeutic gesture. While grief-stricken families can never hold their dear departed little ones anymore, caring for tangible memorials allows them to continue parenting their precious kids and remember them fondly until they see each other again.
